Our 1st ER visit.

It finally happened. Our first ER visit for one of the kids. 

Honestly, I am amazed that we went 7 years without having to take any of our kids, especially with Lily running and climbing anything in sight. We thought for sure she would be our first one to go- we thought with a broken bone. 

But no, it was our littlest munchkin. 

Kate was sort of running, but it was kind of just a fast walk, ahead of me at the elementary school. We had just dropped Jonah and Lily off and we were almost out the door when Kate tripped and fell right into the edge of a metal door frame. 

The sound was enough to make your heart stop. It was horrible. 

There were parents and kids all over since it was drop off time, and everyone stopped to see if she was okay. 

She started screaming and I ran and scooped her up. I was heading outside to take a look and calm her down, but I looked down at her and her whole face was covered in blood. And so was her dress and my jacket. 

It was pretty terrifying seeing her like that. 

I turned around, went back into the school and asked for help. I rushed her into the nurses office, where the nurse got some gauze or something to stop the bleeding. After a couple of minutes, we cleaned off her face a bit to see what was going on. 

Kate had a huge (I say huge because to me, it was HUGE. In reality, it is maybe a little over an inch long) gash on her forehead. To me, it looked really bad. I don't want to get too into the details of her cut, but it was pretty wide open- enough to see things coming out of it. That's as far as I will go. I could hardly look at it- it made me so queasy.

I called Jake to tell him to come back home (he had just left for work) because I knew she would have to go in for stitches. 

I carried Kate home, Jake took a look at her, and I left for the ER. 

Thankfully they got her right in. 

They numbed it, said it was too big for the glue they use, and put in 5 stitches in instead. Then we had to wait a bit to see if she had a concussion, since she hit her head so hard.

Now, let me say how proud I am of Kate. After she calmed down right after she fell, she did not cry or complain ONE time. She was perfect at the hospital and didn't even wince during the stitches. Honestly, she could not have been better. Such a brave little girl :)

After a few hours at the hospital, Kate was starting to act more like herself and was itching to get home. 

Everything has been going well as far as Kate healing up. 

The only issue we ran into was some pretty significant swelling 6 days after. We got into the doctor and it turns out that Kate was having a reaction to the stitches. So, out they came. Thankfully, they were supposed to come out that afternoon anyway. 

So, she is still healing up, but it is finally starting to look a little better. It still looks pretty gross, to me at least. But it is getting better each day. 

So, that's our first ER experience. I am so thankful that it was just for stitches and not something more serious. I am also thankful at how awesome Kate has been the past week. 

And I am praying that we will not have to go back to the ER for quite while. Or ever. That would be just fine with me. 

Right after we got home from the hospital

Having some fun with the band aids. 

First day of school- 1st, kindergarten, preschool.

Right this moment, none of my kids are home. 

They are ALL at school. 

This is the first day that has ever happened. 

A few years ago, I would have been THRILLED at the thought of all my kids being at school, giving me a break. 

But, I'm not. 

This is the 5th year that I have sent kids off to school (Lily had her first year right when she turned 3), and it is by far the hardest. 

I don't think I am having a hard time with it because I am just an overly emotional mom. Well, that might be part of it.... 

but I really think that God has been changing my heart and opening my eyes more and more to how He wants things to be. 

He has changed my perspective of my kids, and is changing how I once thought they should be raised. 

I never ever thought that I would consider homeschooling. But, honestly, I feel like God might be leading us in that direction.  

I am also having a hard time with the fact that my kids are getting older. And that makes me sad. 

But, I had to send them to school anyway. 

Today is Kate's very first day of school. Friday was Jonah's first day of kindergarten. Lily started 1st grade a couple of weeks ago.  It just blows my mind that we are already here- no more babies or toddlers running around. 

1st grade

Kate's visit day- too cute not to share

Kindergarten

Preschool

Outside of her school

First day of soccer!

A new chapter.

Today, Lily started 1st grade. 

Her sign says "1st day of 1st grade! When I grow up I want to be a gymnast"

I am not in denial, but I am sort of shocked that we are already here. I remember, when Lily was a little  baby, saying something along the lines of, "Before we know it, she will be in 1st grade!". 

And now it is here. 

Honestly, I have never been very emotional when it comes to all of Lily's firsts. I'm not sure why. Maybe just because of the excitement of the first and the excitement of her growing and doing new things. 

I wasn't sad when she had her first day of preschool. Actually, I was really glad. I was hugely pregnant and Jonah was about 14 months old and, well, Lily is a handful. 

I wasn't terribly sad when she started full day kindergarten last year. 

But something is different about this year. 

She has always been very independent. 

But now she is on the verge of 7 (Sunday's the big day!) and she is doing SO much on her own all of a sudden. 

She really can do almost anything all by herself now.

 The past few weeks, she has gone playing with friends and I don't see her for a few hours. 

I remember doing the same thing when I was a kid, but it's just really weird to already be at that point as a parent.

I have always thought Jake and I do a pretty good job at fostering independence in our kids, and we are big believers in that. Lately, though, it has been hard for me to let her go. I always do let her go, but it's hard on my mommy heart. 

I think it boils down to the fact that she doesn't need me for much at the moment. And she has this life outside of our house that I am not a part of. 

It's hard to let go and let your kids go off and experience things for themselves. It is so good for her though. I am excited for the experiences she gets to have and the friendships that continue to grow, but it's still hard.

She still seems so young to me. Well, she is still young- she's only 7! I am sure it will get harder to let go even more the older she gets. What am I going to do when she's in middle school and high school?! But maybe it gets a little easier because you get used to it more? Maybe it's especially hard right now because I am right at the beginning and it's so new to me? 

I do know that she will always need me for something. I am mom and I will always be there for her when she needs me. 

It's just really strange, and hard for me, to be doing everything for my kids for years and years and suddenly, I'm not needed much anymore. At least, I am not needed in the same ways.

I guess it's like we are starting a new chapter, at least with Lily. But I know that Jonah and Kate are not too far behind. 

A new chapter where I am not needed to feed, bathe, change, or clothe my girl. She can do all of that on her own now. 

I guess in this new chapter I need to figure out where she does need me. 

Maybe I am being a bit dramatic about the whole thing. But it does feel like something big changed over the summer. It does feel like we are readjusting our roles a bit. And as shocked as I was to realize this shift, it has been hard for me to swallow. 

Despite my feelings, Lily has had a wonderful summer with her increasing independence. Thankfully she is still at an age where, even though she likes her freedom, she also likes to come home and give us hugs, talk about her experiences, and spend time with her family. 

Lily.

Lily, 

You are almost 7. 

You are extremely excited for your birthday and you remind us daily that it is almost here.

Yesterday, you told me "After I am 7, I will be 8! I can't believe how big I am!" 

I sort of can't believe you are going to be 7. 

I remember thinking, when you were a baby, that in no time you would be in 1st grade. Well, here we are. I blinked and now you are going to be starting 1st grade in less than a month! 

Here are some of your favorite things right now: 

- You love your friends. All of them. Even though you love all of your friends, you have a special place in your heart for Max, Grace, Jacob and Emma-Jean. 

- You love to write. And I love this about you. You have been writing since you were 3 years old and now you are on to writing stories that are pages and pages long. I can't wait to read more. 

- You also love to draw. You work so hard on your art and you love to illustrate your own books. 

- You are extremely athletic and so far, have done amazingly well in every single sport you have tried. You are great at soccer, baseball, gymnastics, swimming, running and biking. I have a hard time choosing which sport to sign you up for because there are so many you like! This fall, we are continuing with soccer, because that seems to be a wonderful fit for you, and you are VERY good! This summer you have been working on your diving, back flips and back dives in our neighbors pool!

- You love to sing and put on plays for us, although you are still a bit shy to do it in front of other people. 

- You love babies. So much. And they love you! I think you will be a great babysitter someday. 

- You absolutely love your yellow blanket that Aunt Beth made you when you were 2. It is pretty much falling apart, and smells kinda weird, but you insist it's your favorite and you won't let Aunt Beth make you a new one. You even love how it smells. 

-You also love Twinkle. Your pink stuffed bear you made at Build a Bear with Sara. You can't sleep at night if you don't have Twinkle and your yellow blanket. 

- You are very smart and a great student at school. I love how much you love learning and love school. 

- You love to read. This past year you have taken off with your reading and now can really read anything on your own. And you love to read to Jonah and Kate, which is always so nice to see :) 

- You love being outdoors.

- Last night you told me that your three favorite foods right now are couscous, yellow rice (curried rice) and zucchini. 

- You call Lily Pads/Lily flowers your "sisters" 

- One of your favorite movies is How to Train Your Dragon

- You still get pretty upset when you don't get your own way, but you are working hard on that, and Daddy and I are really proud of you.

There are many more things that you love in this life, but these are the ones that really stick out. 

I love you Lily! 

Last day of soccer!

Ready for a beach day with Max

Last day of Kindergarten (and field trip day, hence the yellow shirt)

At Tim and Ginger's wedding with just Mommy and Daddy.

- 

My Village.

Everyone always says "It takes a village to raise a child".

I don't think you truly understand what this means or how true it is until you have children. 

Ever since Lily was born, I have had a really hard time asking for help with my kids. I felt like I should be able to do it on my own (with Jake, of course).  Any time someone would take the kids, I felt really guilty about it.  

I would say that this past year or two, I have really started to embrace my "village", accept the help, and be grateful for it. 

Since we moved into this house, our "village" has grown a lot. 

Neighbors have turned into friends and then turned into family.

This is just a glimpse into our village:

Friends, family and neighbors will occasionally ask to take the kids to their house for a while, just to give me a break and give the kids a change in scenery. 

Sometimes someone will ask to take them to the playground for a while.

Some of our closest neighbors watch the kids for me if I need to take one kid to the doctor. Or on rainy days they will come over and stay with the kids so I don't have to drag them all out in the rain to go pick Lily up from school. 

Sara has been our #1 babysitter for the past 4 years and I don't know what we would have done without her. She is absolutely a part of our family and we love her so much.

Today, Grandpa and Cyndi took the kids all afternoon. And now that they live so much closer, we get to see them much more and it is so nice to have them nearby.

Aunt Mariah is now close to us too!! And she is amazing and wonderful and we all love her dearly. 

Grandma Jan takes the kids one by one for special overnights with her. She also takes 2 or all 3 of the kids if Jake and I need it. She took Jonah and Kate the other week while Jake, Lily and I went to a wedding. She is so wonderful to us. 

Our friends are incredible and I LOVE that we have seen each other almost every week for the past 8 years!  It is so fun seeing our families grow. We went from all being young single college kids to being married and having babies and our group keeps growing! You all mean so much to our family and we are so thankful for you.

There are many  more people that are a part of our village and without each and every one of you, we wouldn't be where we are today. 

I guess what I am saying is that I appreciate my "village" so much and am so thankful to all of you that help look out for my family. I am fairly certain I would lose my mind if it were not for my village. 

I am starting to be more comfortable accepting the help of my village, because it is oh so good for me, but it is also great for my kids too. 

If you have a hard time accepting help from others, I urge you to do it anyway. It really does take a village to raise a child, and that village is also what shapes them into the people they are becoming. 

Thank you, village, for saving my sanity, but also for loving my family so much.

Lately.

So far, summer has not been terribly relaxing.

In fact, I feel like we have not really started summer yet because we have been so busy. 

We've been working on my new laundry room and new half bathroom (pics to come! It's looking great!), we went to the Poconos, we went to a wedding, I had jury duty, Jake's been working lots and lots of hours at the fire station, we've been working on our garden (but honestly, it looks a bit unruly at the moment...), I started watching a new full time 13 month old, Lily and Jonah are going to our church's music camp this week, we've had doctors appointments, we've had family visiting, I won Red Sox tickets (Woohoooo, date night! Can't wait for August 2nd!), we had a bit of a plumbing emergency, and we found out that Jonah is having surgery on August 13th- tonsils and adenoids (if you have any advice on this, please share with me!). 

All of this, and more, just in the past 2 weeks. 

I am at that point in my life where I wish there were more hours in each day. 

Things have been good, just really busy. I keep waiting for life to slow down, but that just isn't happening.

But back to Jonah. 

After visiting an Ear Nose and Throat doctor a couple weeks ago, it was decided that it's best if Jonah gets his tonsils and adenoids removed. He gets so many throat infections every year. His adenoids are enlarged and his tonsils "look like golf balls". The funny thing is that Jonah is actually looking forward to his "injury", as he calls it (he means surgery, though). We've been reading the book "Goodbye Tonsils" and he is VERY excited for all of the ice cream, popsicles and gum he will get after. He also thinks he will get presents thanks to that book. 

My plan so far is to take him out shopping, just him, for things he can have after the surgery. He needs lots of fluids and only soft foods for a while. Then he will need lots of time on the couch resting. I am praying that recovery will be okay for him because 2 weeks later he starts up with his kindergarten visit day and screening at school. His first day isn't until Sept. 5th though, so he will have a bit more time to lay low if he needs it. 

So, I suppose summer is going well so far, it's just been non-stop so far. And it's flying by! At Target today they were already setting up the displays for back to school. 

I am sort of in denial that at the end of next month I will have a 1st grader, kindergartner, and preschooler. Where does the time go?!?

Heroes.

Jake has been a firefighter for just over 2 years now. 

He honestly never ceases to amaze me with the dedication and hard work he puts into firefighting. 

Now, don't get me wrong. If you know Jake at all, you know that he gives 150% towards everything he does. 

But there is something about firefighting, he makes the extra effort to give even more. 

And I must say, he is one amazing firefighter. 

And he loves it. 

It's different being on the other side of things. 

Like most everyone else, I never thought too hard about our everyday heroes. I respected them and thought they were incredibly brave and selfless. And you just know that in an emergency, they would be there helping and saving lives. 

But now that I am on the other side, I can see that it's so much more than that. I can see the sacrifices they make, how hard they work, how much training they go through, the sacrifices their families make, how they are ready 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to run out the door when that tone goes out, and how certain calls can really take their toll, emotionally and physically. 

Last night, there was a bad car accident, not too far from our house. The tone went off and Jake was out the door. He came home nearly 2 hours later- that's how I knew it was a bad accident. 

He comes home and I can tell that it was a hard call for him.

He came and sat down next to me- it was late, but I wanted to say up and wait for him.  He tells me a bit about the accident. How he was the one that had to crawl into the mangled car to check on the guy that was crushed and trapped inside. How he was holding the man's head still and talking to him the whole time, keeping him calm and still while firefighters outside the car cut and sawed pieces of the car away to free them both. How the injured man squeezed Jake's hand when he was scared and thought he might die and how he finally helped get him out and loaded into the ambulance after being trapped for over an hour. 

These heroes experience so much on these calls, and then they come home and sit on the couch with their wife, just like any other person. 

When Jake was talking to me about the accident, I couldn't help but think " You honestly just did all of that in an hour and half, trying to save a man's life, and now you are just sitting here on our stained IKEA couch sipping your drink. Something about that seems off."  

It seems like after doing something that heroic and amazing, it just seems strange to be doing something so ordinary. 

These men and women at true heroes. Not that I didn't know that before, but now that I can see the other side of it, now that my husband is one of those heroes, it is just so obvious now. 

If you see one, just say thank you to a fire fighter or anyone else that works in public service. I promise it will make their day and they will feel so appreciated. 

This is the accident- pray for the man that was injured- we don't know if whether or not he made it. 

http://hamilton-wenham.patch.com/groups/police-and-fire/p/car-slams-into-pole-closes-rt-1a-for-over-an-hour